The Lie: “He was charming, loving and a hard worker.”

September 14, 2016

JOANIE:

The Lie

“He was charming, loving and a hard worker.”

The Truth

“He only acted this way when he was clean and sober and those days became fewer and further between.”

Honestly, I’ve never had a healthy relationship.  I was abused as a child which destroyed my core value  belief system about myself.

It was December, 2012 I made the decision to marry my boyfriend. Not too long after  we were married, alcohol and drugs took over and I rationalized the abuse with the fact that, when clean and sober, he was charming, loving and a hard worker. But, those  days became fewer and farther between.

I became clinically depressed and suicidal. One day, I confided in my daughter who  introduced to the term narcissist and sociopath. I started researching, found a support  group online. The support group and the  survivors there gave me the courage to seek shelter. I made an escape plan,  called Safe Harbor and was told to come in. I escaped the very next day while he was at work and was  accepted into their loving arms where i worked 2 jobs, saved my money, went through their HAP  program and got my own home. Without this organization, I may not even be alive today!!

Thank you, Safe Harbor. I AM A SURVIVOR!!

I am a survivor of domestic violence.


“I didn’t know that I was being abused...

I am a survivor of domestic violence.


“I didn’t know that I was being abused because my definition of abuse looked different. My husband pushed me, but most of my suffering was verbal and psychological. I left my husband to protect our young daughter. Almost immediately I felt the weight of his oppression begin to lift. I could see a difference in my daughter as well. Then he broke into my home and assaulted me in-front of her.

I sought help and was led to Safe Harbor. My daughter and I are in counseling now. I am sorting out the mess that abuse has caused. I am finding my voice and seeking opportunities to grow and better my life as well as my daughter's. She will gauge her self-worth from my own self-worth. I must show her that she deserves the best, by expecting the best for myself.

Many years I suffered in silence. By telling my story and being honest with friends and family, I am taking control of my life again.”

- Beth

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